Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverTrees
You could try something like: "I respect your time and boundaries. I know I need to adjust my expectations for our time spent together due to your change in schedule. It is easier for me to be understanding and supportive when you directly tell me up front that you are simply not free next time. That prevents me from planning and feeling disappointed later."
You may also want to reflect on why he says yes and later cancels rather than just saying "I can't" in advance. Perhaps you don't know why. Were you always okay with "I can't" previously in your relationship or did that sometimes lead to an argument? I'm just throwing out ideas. It's great that you are looking at both sides of your relationship. Very important. Well done!!!
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When he says “I can’t” I would complain, whine and yes it would lead to an argument. He would start just saying “yes” to please me..so he has been creating boundaries this past month. I don’t even initiate it now, he does. So I don’t know if it’s because he feels obligated, or what the reason is. I wish I knew..he may just legitimately not be up to it by the time it rolls around but I’m making assumptions..last couple times I feel it could have been due to me hounding him my text and phone, and questioning him so he may have gotten turned off...