I forgot to say we also talked about vacations and what could i do with them. i said i only want to go at my parents and rest, while she made me think of possible travelling destinations. i came up with 3 but also with reasons i couldnt take all 3 trips.

maybe the most significant topic though was only breifly mentioned at the end of the session, but worth mentioning it here. my life has changed a lot since i met her, 3 years ago. im not sure its thanks to her but maybe a bit, yes. i did what i had to do (i believe we create the life we have planned, even if only subconsciously) and she gently accompained me with her presence. she did not do or say anything enlightening but she was there.

im not sure of where im going or what will happen yet, but i must admit my life has changed a lot. from being totally without control, having intrusive thoughts that made me crazy and attempting sui, to having a normal job and a flat and living on my own. these are big life changes. im not even sure i like them, (i kind of liked being so desperate and needy and followed by someone) but thats my life now. i must remind myself now im totally free of re-inventing and re-building my life as i want it to be.