I know that you're not trying to tell me what to do, how to think, etc. I also didn't find anything condescending in what you wrote.

Yes, I've suffered from depression for as long as I can remember. I currently take Wellbutrin and Lexapro for it. I also take Adderall for my combined ADHD/ADD.

I practice mindfulness and gratitude meditations. I always look for the silver lining in every experience.

I just can't see anything getting any better, nor can I conceive of a future that is any different from my past. I work hard to change things, I just keep ending up in the same, ole place.