I am sorry about your mother. She is very irresponsible. It's like a drunk thinking they are fine to drive a car. As for the reflux, the main culprit in babies digestive issues is dairy. I would knock off all dairy for a week and see if he improves. Secondly with me it was peanuts and tomatoes. Of course spices sometimes don't agree as well. I was on a very bland diet for long time for this reason. Try it and see what happens. LeLeche has a bunch of books you can try to get at the library. I liked the motherly art of Breastfeeding. Is he in a sitting up swing already? Wow, it used to be only for babies over three months. I had one with my second that was a bassinet basket that rocked like a cradle. We would crank it up and she would fall asleep. My husband would carry the bassinet part up when we went to bed and she would wake by 12:00 and you know the rest. Warm memories.

Many docs do not know much about breastfeeding so do your own research regarding the reflux. Oh yeah, there is a school of thought about soothers with young babies. The thought is that they are sucking because they are hungry. Supply and demand thing here. Just go with your gut. Good luck.