""People make fun of me for this, but I can drive for 5 hours without listening to anything, just with my thoughts." Me: "You mean music? I know you're not that into that. Or do you mean not even a podcast or something?" T: "Nothing at all, just driving." "

OMG That made me so excited LOL. Your T is me. I finally "found" another person like this. I thought it was just me and my weirdness. I hate talking and music etc in the car... but I do like company because of my driving anxiety...however I'm fine with them just being present, no need to talk or whatever. Even if I'm a passenger, I prefer silence. I'm like this in a lot of situations. I crave silence.


Anyway... CBT worksheets can be helpful. T did print me off one once and it was kind of like what you described and filling it out was helpful. It helped me see different views on my thinking. I still have a copy of one. Baby T has been redirecting my thoughts and helping me see more "grey" area in my otherwise black/white thinking. I think CBT could really help us both

I haven't done mindfulness but let us know how it works for you. I am trying to live more in the present. It's a bit tough but I am doing better than I expected so far.

Also...I do think you should talk about your need for people to have certain reactions to things. It seems to come up alot, quite often with T but in other situations too. Like you get these reactions you want them to have in your mind and if they don't... you feel uncared about or less than or whatever and it bothers you. People can't be something they are not. I am not trying to be mean about this. I honestly have no clue what this comes from or how to fix it, I just see it often and see the pain and distress is causes you. I would say it's really worth working on if you can

I know we have talked too about your goal of weekly sessions, it may take a while still but I think you will get there. One day at a time. Hope today goes well for you, whatever you choose to discuss there.