Mickey, darling, has something specific brought this outpouring on? Seriously, did something recently happen that deeply disturbed you? So you've downed 2 bottles of wine and are banging your head against the bedpost, what?

You've made it clear recently on the forum that you feel you've come up against a brick wall with your education, you're not sure what you're going to do with your life, and so on. You're trying to find your way. As people have said, this is not at all unusual. It's kind of one of those life passages that can take some time to resolve.

But somehow just knowing that doesn't seem to help you much. There seem to be some underlying forces that are more deeply wracking you. I particularly noticed one sentence in your post that kind of stood out to me:

[I'm not able to say that I need help to those who could help.]

You're welcome to expand on that more privately to me if you wish, as to who those people are and why you don't feel you can go to them. Without names of course. If there's anything I can do to help, even if it's just lending an ear, I'm more than glad to try.

In the meantime, if you want good, supportive advice, all you have to do is read one of your own generous-hearted posts to people on this forum who are in pain.

And by the way, you are NONE of those awful things you said about yourself above. I don't even know where you GOT those things. What part of you did they come from? And none of them - I repeat, NONE of them - approach being true. You are a human being. You no doubt have faults and weaknesses as do the rest of us. As they say, there was one perfect person, and look what happened to Him.

Please, please, please don't do anything rash. At least wait till the wine wears off! I'd be willing to bet that every single person on this forum cares about you. You may not be a great genius or astrophysicist or Pablo Picasso, but you are obviously a sweet, loving, giving, human being. Now are you like that on the inside, but having a hard time putting it out on the outside, for any number of reasons?

Trust me, you are well worth saving. Keep talking to us, and me, here on the Forum. Much love.... :group hug: