T didn’t say much in text. Will have to survive till I see him Wednesday. I guess he assumes I’m safe enough till then and can assess me then. I feel awful.

I’m not so sure though. I guess I can call the hospital if things get worse. I’m on my own tonight as I want to go for an early swim and my parents are much further from the beach. The ocean calms me. I didn’t go this morning as I hadn’t slept and felt shattered. I regret it now. I need things that lift my spirits. It’s 10 am and I’m already overwhelmed. Once I’m back from errands I will take meds, clean my flat and go to bed early if possible. I hate this. I want to stay home, not IP, but if I’m honest with my T I know he will send me to the hospital.