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Howdy warmup & Saidso,
As with anything I play with, I gain if anything in it turns out useful to me. The SCARF piece are domains intuitively used to scope out safety and/or threat.
Once this idea moves to more distant people than oneself and their less nudge-able behavior, it's likely it still works but I sense the strength weakens. There are also other schema like Maslov's hierarchy of needs that can be mapped onto experience. Like all maps, they burnish part of the full context and hide or ignore others.
As the developer of SCARF is a neuro-scientist, the 'data' is constrained to one person. Being trained as a scientist he doubtless applied or 'discovered' these patterns from outside himself. I'm taking them up and applying/playing with them inside-out.
Speaking of inside out, I awoke reminded of Robin Norwood's book, Women who loved too much, when you keep wishing and hope he'll change. Disclosure: I'm a male/man. But I have license to read anything, so I read it in my 20s and it led to me changing me! The publication year was 1985, and I read it maybe in 86 or 87, so I was 23/24.
The last remaining takeaway in my mind: stop letting the feeling of "longing" define what "living" or "life" means! Living is not longing, however strong that longing feels. My shorthand is change longing to having (also from the book).
Now, with my ramped up work schedule, I let longing sneak back in. Wouldn't it be nice if they changed. Or I escaped. Or I didn't have to skip some cool art event. etc. etc.
So, this morning, Longing, you can't fool me, hiding behind that tree!
[This is a song covered by Ry Cooder but I can't seem to catch in on youtube.] No more time for longing,
To the day,
Revu2
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