There's things that a normal person should be paranoid about but for me it's like my brain is soaked in sweet antipsychotic.

I think I might ask to try an off label antidepressant. I'm sick of feeling sad all the time.. although maybe I can appreciate music better.. idk... an antidepressant that isn't an SSRI or SNRI something like tianeptine.. but that's a legal research chemical.. oh no now I'm thinking about RC's again...

I need better therapy