I am especially sensitive right now to personal slights. I had another thread where I talked about being ghosted by a long-time gf online, which hurt me badly.

Then last night I discovered that one of my oldest college girlfriends, with whom I lived for over three years after college, unfriended me on Facebook. I do not know when, but I believe it's been in the last year since she got married. And I feel seriously hurt. At one time, we were the best and closest of friends. Admittedly, we haven't really spoken in many years, but I still wanted the connection to her, at least on Facebook to see what she's up to. But apparently, she doesn't want the connection with me anymore.

Then at work today, I got all sensitive over an account manager revising my work a little to present to to a client of ours. I had highlighted certain sections of a document on purpose to talk about in our meeting, and she removed the highlights. I don't know why I feel slighted by this, but I do anyways.

I am typically a pretty sensitive person all around, but I feel unusually sensitive right now.

I guess I feel most especially bad about people unfriending me or leaving me behind.

Last night when I went to bed, I took stock of my closest friends that I have left. There's a handful, but I was hurting over the loss of these two friends.

I know that friendships change over time, especially as we get older. I understand this fact of life. I just cannot help but feel hurt. Like what did I do??

Then I felt grateful for the few friends I have left, even though it's a real serious motley crew.

And I even wondered, how can my fiance love someone like me? I felt like a total loser, without a large circle of friends around me like he has. He has a ton of friends, and I counted six close friends in my geographic area that I can count on. And they're all kind of weird and odd in their own ways.. I suppose like me. I'm a little odd I would say.

So then I came back to: why does he even love me?

Yep, swirling thoughts. I had a terrible day today.