Well you're not damaged and weak. You have to know that you're a survivor. I'm sorry to hear about what happened. I would never ask because I knew it was that bad just by the subtle ways you explain by how much pain you're in from things like that.

Are you seeing a therapist soon? Does he/she know about your trauma?

PTSD can give flashbacks and the whole bit. One second you can be fine and then all of a sudden the traumatic thoughts pop up in your head and you obsess about them. I know this from my own obsessive thoughts and that's just the way the brain works. We can't think of everything at the same time. It revolves around in circles. Some bits get left out forever, or can pop up 5 years later. That's why we memorize things in school by thinking about things over and over again to reconnect neurons in the brain to form memory.

But you have bad stuff in your long term memory that you'll never forget. You have to come to terms with it, try to distract, be spiritual and overcome, know that you're beautiful, intelligent (All the good things - replace the good with the bad). There's negative people and there's positive people. There's no telling which had trauma or not. The negative person could have had it good. My mom was and she's very positive.

I'm still learning about these things. We all are and we will learn for the rest of our lives. There's no such thing as literal demons because there's no proof.. when there is proof, they're for a reason like a statue or something or a movie, otherwise it's called a hallucination if one person saw it. If many people see demons at the same time, they better take a picture otherwise that means it's still a coincidence hallucination..