My T doesn’t have strict rules or boundaries and has yet to really tell me no. He knows I am terrified of crossing his boundaries. I mentioned in an email my greatest fear in talking about hard stuff with him was that I would move my chair too close to him or reach out to hold his hand. The next session the chairs were closer together and the next time I was feeling vulnerable he reached out and held my hand. He says we can talk about boundaries any time but when we do his reply is usually thanking me for sharing where I was at rather than giving me the longed for list of rules and the high visibility tape around his personal space. But... there is a give and take. The only reason I haven’t gone completely bonkers with this style from him is because of how very firmly he established that he would not react to me... we would talk through things. He is aware that even gently saying that something I did made him a little uncomfortable would throw me into deep shame and an emotional storm from heck... so he knows to tread very lightly.