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Old Mar 30, 2019, 05:45 PM
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Have Hope Have Hope is offline
Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,721
Quote:
Originally Posted by StreetcarBlanche View Post
It always rubs me the wrong way, when people use the platitude, "oh it wasn't personal about you." How do you know? Maybe it was? I get it. People are trying to soften the blow, but saying something like that, is akin to telling someone at a funeral, "they're in a better place now." How do you know that? What makes you the expert? And, I didn't need you to tell me that but thanks. Cynical, much? Yes, yes, I am.

I have been ghosted before by former friends online - 3 I knew since college, 2 I only knew as pen pals online - and it really hurt my feelings not being given a reason why. Should I delude myself thinking it had nothing to do with me? No. Of course it had to do with me. I"m the only other variable in the friendship. Obviously, they decided they didn't like me anymore, so they just deleted me.

People don't just cut you out because they decided to go off of Facebook, or are going through a rough time. No. People cut you out, when you stop being a priority to them in their life. It's unfortunate that this is how people handle social media connections; their lack of manners astounds me. If I no longer matter to you in your life, at least have the decency to tell me that b/c I'd rather feel hurt by the truth, than hurt not knowing 'why' I'm no longer important to you.

Oh my gosh... I can so relate to what you're saying! I bolded what resonated with me the most, and I agree! I would much rather be hurt by the truth, ie, we need to go our separate ways, then to be ghosted and left wondering why???????

I hate that feeling! Don't people realize how very hurtful it is? It seems so selfish to me... so self-absorbed... like they are the ones that matter, not you or your feelings.

And yes, the lack of manners!!! Common courtesy????? Thoughtfulness????? Sensitivity????? Where did that go???????

I get it. TY so much. And so sorry you've been hurt too. It's not right, and it's not OK. It IS a reflection on them as a person and their character.
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