I don't think it's unusual for a T to not schedule you for a regular appointment in the beginning, until you have established that you want it. I don't think it's an automatic thing and it doesn't sound like you asked for that and she agreed to do that. I was every other week for awhile and requested last year to go back to once/week. I had to shift to another slot and wait a couple of months until something opened up. This is after seeing him for 8 years. It's not your T's job to guess at what you want or accommodate your schedule. It is perfectly legitimate for you to decide for this or any other reason that you don't want to deal with hers.

What I would do is be very clear that I wanted an every week appointment and ask whether she has a weekly slot open that I could take. If she does or it didn't work for me, I would investigate other T's.

Taking a week off for self care seems a better option to me than having a T show up for session who's not really capable of being there. But I think "oh, this week I'm taking off for self care" should be a very rare occurrence, as I think this can be scheduled ahead of time and not just popped on clients.

A five day cancellation policy wouldn't bother me, nor does my T's 24 hour one. I don't see either as "high standards" but I've also discovered that policies are usually more flexible, if you ask, than they seem in the abstract. I'm rarely sick and in the past year, I totally spaced one session and even though my T could have charged me for it (they can't bill insurance), he didn't. Another time I was sick and canceled a few hours before, and recently my kid had to cancel a session same day and no charges from that either. I think all these kinds of policies are for those kinds of people-- and we all have met them-- who can't show up when they're supposed to and repeatedly bail on their appointments. If you're not that kind of person I wouldn't worry about it.