You actually always had a libido mismatch in your marriage, as your wife never got sexual satisfaction due to a medical problem. Are you sure that is even true, or could that be what she told you was the reason when The true reason was possibly an intimacy issue?

It sounds to me like she’s put up with sex for your benefit all these years and she now feels like she just wants you to stop bothering her already.

What is the resistance to her touching you with her hands?