Honey, trust me on this one -- laxatives and purging will just kill you in the end. You may think you want to lose "15 pounds of fat" right away, but that's not really what you're looking for.

How about thinking about what you really want? Is it to feel good about yourself? To be admired by someone else? To feel attractive? More self-confidence? What does that "15 pounds of fat" represent to you?

What's more, through the nutritional counseling and refeeding program I'm going through right now, I've learned something else -- one of those sick, cosmic jokes, but true -- when you've been malnourished and underweight for any length of time, you put all the new weight on around your midsection. So, if you've been starving yourself, or purging away weight, you'll regain it right around your belly. Only time will redistribute that weight, so there's not a lot you can do about it.

Vomiting and laxatives won't really get the calories out of your system, since they still allow most of the calories to be absorbed. Combine that fact with how sick they'll both make you, and how much lasting damage they can do, and ask yourself if you really want to do that? The answer should be NO!

Are you seeing a therapist? Going to any support groups? Doing anything to improve your situation? If not, why not?

Good luck to you.