Since having a couple of psychotic breaks and having to increase my AP, I feel numb and empty a lot. I just had a recent med change, like 2 weeks ago, and I feel a little freer, if that makes sense. When I was younger, I felt happiness more. Now, I'm pretty much a flat line with lots of dips. When I watch a comedian, that helps. Laughing helps. Seeing photos of cats helps. Or videos. It makes me smile inside and out.