I felt like I couldn't make it to Monday morning. I fell asleep in a chair and woke up to find that my bf had gotten out of bed and made his way to a chair without help. This is dangerous. Normally he uses a walker, but mostly a wheelchair. I got angry.

Slowly it dawned on me that I'm blaming him for behavior that probably is not under his control, as he has significant dementia that worsens when be is ill. Then it dawned on me that I am angry because I am trying to manage a situation that has become beyond what I can manage, singlehandedly at home. I called his adult daughter, who was supportive and told him to listen to me. I thanked her, but knew anyone admonishing this man was going to get nowhere.

Then it occurred to me that, by Monday morning, the 2 infections he has would probably get worse. Then I asked myself why I do so have to wait for the nursing home to help. So I called 911 and said I have a sick man who cannot cooperate with getting the care he needs at home.

I told the paramedics about his skin sores getting worse day-by-day and his behavioral problems getting dangerous. I even got my bf to agree he needed medical attention.

So now he's in the ER sound asleep in a bed. I am here waiting to talk to whatever doctors come by. I feel relieved that what was becoming a crisis may be about to get reasonably sorted out.

I'm hoping they will keep him here till Monday, during which time they can treat his two infections. He was not wanting me to care for his two wound areas. Here they can give him stronger pain medication and even sedation, if that's what it takes for him to tolerate care for his back. This started with a reaction to a toxic cancer drug that caused this awful rash that became 2 open sores. He can't stand me touching them. Well, why should he? I was making up my own treatment, which the oncologist encouraged me to do. But these areas appear infected and are becoming ulcerated. It should be a doctor familiar with this reaction to prescribe the treatment and dressing. And I'm not taking him out of here till they do exactly that.

Certain things just did not occur to me, until I became totally exasperated. I needed to realize that I am not the only party responsible to address all this. The hospital that treats his cancer has a duty to evaluate and treat a serious adverse reaction he is having to his cancer medication.

The staff here have been very nice. The feeling I had of total exasperation has lifted. My bf and I just needed more help - now - of the right kind. I think we've found it.

I'm grateful for all the encouraging posts. Sometimes I try for too long by myself to fix a problem that others, besides me, should be working on.