Apr 06, 2019 at 01:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverTrees
I don't think the problems in your marriage are all about sex. I think there are some other things going on there too. You mentioned your wife's low self-esteem/body image struggles. It is going to be hard for her to feel free and to truly connect with you when she is feeling somewhat disconnected from herself. She needs to take ownership of her problems and the fact that they also affect you and the marriage. For her to simply deny the problems or shut down any dialogue is actually disrespectful to you.
|
This is such a true statement and beautifully put. I think its worth considering.
Quote:
|
I believe that a partner has a right to say that therapy is necessary when there is a significant disconnect in the marriage. That could of course be presented in a loving way...but I think it needs to be presented as essential at this point. If I remember right, you're both young and haven't been married long, yes? Whatever you accept now in your marriage is likely to be something you will be expected to accept your whole life unless there is some appropriate intervention now. Another way to think about it....is this how all problems in the marriage will be addressed (there will be more of course down the road....marriage is work)? She makes unilateral decisions and you are expected to go along with it without complaint? I think it's helpful to look at the big picture there.
|
This is especially good. A marriage just won't work if only one partner is fulfilled. Barring physical limitations and all that- if one partner needs help communicating their needs and help fulfilling their partners' needs then i think lovingly but persistently insisting on giving it a try is very important. It is not selfish of you and you know its not only about sex. Sex IMO is a manifestation on love and a physical way to demonstrate it and I believe it is very important.
__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"
President of the no F's given society.
|