This is what alcoholics do Gymgirl, they have all kinds of reasons for it being ok to drink and can even get angry in defense of their right to make these excuses.

I watched my father do it AND my husband do it. They both denied they had a problem too. Any time someone tried to point it out they made it a point to blame that person as being the problem. Also, your boy friend's friends are more his drinking buddies as that's ususally what alcoholics end up having as friends.

At this point be thankful you are not married to this guy. It's important to see the REALITY of what he is and how that is affecting you. It's time for you to walk away, you are right in that you deserve better, a person who is capable of having a relationship and is not all about their relationship with alcohol.