Tho I had a nice childhood,my family became totally dysfunctional when my dad became an alcoholic and left us when I was 14. He still tried to be a good dad, but it was a tough situation because my mom was hospitalized w depression, two series of electroshock treatments, and breast cancer which I truly feel is often brought on by stress. I fixed my mom up with my perfect boss who turned out to be a jerk as a stepfather, trying to put distance between us as young adults and her. We moved all over the country and are not close today.
I have a son and grandkids in San Diego. My son totally does not get me and treats me like a nut tho I have 3 degrees. He is actually verbally abusive to me. I know he is overworked coaching his kids sports teams as well as doing his job. This year I finally started cancelling holidays with them until he can treat me in a courteous manner. I bought a van so we can have fun outings together.
MOST IMPORTANTLY, I have started to build an online family. I currently have my online brother Gary across the country in New Jersey and my online son James in Wales, and my mother or sister Karen in Phoenix.. I use the website no longer lonely for those with mental illness ($40 lifetime) . Oddly, I find it easier to meet men friends. Women mainly seem to want to meet men. I met Karen on a community forum called Nextdoor. This whole approach has been so fulfilling.
I totally understand how painful it is to deal with an alcoholic dad who chooses not to go to AA. So tough. Sarah Sweets has so much experience with AA, I hope she posts to your thread. Big hugs!!!