i am sorry i didn't respond to your post yesterday... i had to step away for a bit... not yours but some of the posts were really triggering me and i was having a hard time staying in an adult frame of mind...
unfortunately acting out is what children that age do to help them process what is happening to them...children that aren't abused begin to explore their bodies at that time also... the way i found out that my son had been abused was through his play with an older child... she was very sexual for her age and was engaging in not age appropriate play... when i spoke to my son about it ... the fact that he had been molested came out... it was just about the hardest thing i ever had to do ... but well worth the pain ... he is doing well now.... much better then i am... i am just now beginning to deal with my issues... one of the keys for his healing was our t... he was/is a real blessing in our lives... if your not in t that would help....i am sorry that happened to you...lyn