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Kiya said:
i do not want kids - i do not want to become the monster my parents were.
if my not having kids breaks the cycle for this family, then so be it, both on the sexual and physical abuse side of things.

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From my own experience I would say breaking the cycle is more of a "State of Mind" than any thing else...... meaning you can break the cycle of sexual, emotional and physical abuse by choosing to do so as I did when I got married and went on to birth & raise two very caring young men, plus I loved and cared for my handicap daughter with great compassion until the day she passed away at ten years old.... not to mention that I am a very loving person and Aunt that has helped raise most of the niece and nephews in the family for I was the stay at home mom and I am now helping in the care of my great-niece and nephews.

So you see YOU can CHANGE matters by merely putting your MIND to it - the CYCLE can be BROKEN with YOU - children and all if you desire to have them.

You can be anything you put your mind to..... as I am totally opposite of the family I grew up in and from the hell I was forced to live in.