Even if you pursue a divorce, if you have no where to go--do not leave! Everything you own is half yours and "possession is 9/10s of the law." Divorce is a big deal and of course asking for one will effect your relationship. It hurts when our partners don't want us or are irritable.

While it's unfortunate your husband missed his counseling appointment, I think you should consider getting counseling to. Your relationship is already rough and if you go through with a divorce, it may get worse. Also, make sure you have your own bank account, phone, etc before taking any concrete actions.

Since you are confused, I am not trying to say whether you should divorce or not. It is a big decision.