Sorry I haven't been here to read your kind words. Here is an update...he now doesn't want any more kids. At all! That had now broken my heart. He won't talk about it. I need to talk about it. I need closer. I'm now going to see a therapist. He is too. For reason's that have nothing to do with children and to much to write about here.

The funny thing is...he doesn't use protection, as I sit here writting this I could very well be pregnant. I'm afraid if I am I could lose him or he could try to push an abortion on to me. It's not like I tried to get pregnant. I guess I figured if he didn't want to have another baby he would use protection.

I'm so thankful for all the advice. If you have more please let me know. Thanks.