Hello GhostFox,
I am so sorry that you are struggling. Thank you for sharing your truth. That's an important step in healing. I think the psych community has come a long way in helping folks with social anxiety. Meds are always an option but I tend to think of them as good for a last resort after other options have been explored.
Perhaps a therapeutic approach could be a good starting point? With an experienced therapist who specializes in social anxiety. I think desensitization may be useful for you. Gradually facing the triggering experiences just in very small increments step by step with a non-judgmental therapist giving you coping strategies and support. It sounds like this is significantly affecting your daily function so I recommend a chat with your local doc for a referral to a psychologist (PhD) or counselor with a master's degree.
I think when anxiety is unmanaged, it tends to grow. That has been my experience with it. I find acupuncture and guided meditation very helpful for relieving anxiety. Perhaps even being able to have an open conversation with a kind doctor could help you to start feeling less alone with the anxiety?
Hopefully being able to share on PC will also help. I wish you peace, hope, and a bright future!