I learned the hard way that there just was never enough I could do to be consistently considered good and feel safe with my mother. I sure tried to show her love and make her happy and proud of me. I still do.

I keep a careful balance now of not playing into the toxic drama by not giving her any information to gossip about to the rest of the family and to distort and use against me.

I do what I need to do to maintain the basic relationship I need to have with her, for my own well being.