I don’t think I would get as attached - at least not in the way I was before.

Part of what I gained out of this painful experience is recognizing signs of unhealthy attachment and keeping distance from people that this is likely to occur with in the future. Therapy helped uncover unmet needs, so at a minimum I can recognize my blind spots and protect myself from addictive relationships better going forward. I don’t hold the illusion anymore that anyone can fill what I never had in my childhood. I no longer subconsciously search for mothers and I try to be my own mother.

Other therapist-like people I have worked with since have been male (like EMDR therapist, acupuncturist, GP). There doesn’t seem to be that same propensity to try to get mothering care.

Thank you for the nice words!