I thought I'd try a different one when I had the first one, and it wasn't feeling enough.

I have been reflecting a lot though and think that some things just aren't going to work with talk therapy. I've basically decided to deal with my grief alone now. Nothing has changed with it. Nothing at all.

I am "unsure" about deal with my long term trauma and self worth stuff because it seems like things that could take years, and if any sort of "relationship" formed in therapy, I'd quit. I don't want to be in therapy for years. So basically it was just curiosity, and testing things, now I'm unsure where to go from here