Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope
I am tempted to reach out to this girlfriend I've been talking about on here, the one I think who is self-centered. I guess I am hoping someone here will stop me.
I am home alone on a day off with not much to do except my taxes. I like connecting with people. It's not for a lack of connection. I was with a bunch of my friends IRL yesterday. I guess it's that I am alone at home. I am also guessing because she's depressed, she's not reaching out and that perhaps I should reach out to her to see if she's Ok.
Maybe I am a co-dependent. I don't know. I hate mental health labels. But if I do reach out, I suppose I am enabling this one-sided friendship even further, whereby I am still supporting her mostly and not getting much in return.. feeding into her self-centeredness.
Maybe I just need to keep busy today instead.
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I don't think checking to see if she's ok is necessarily enabling. You could maybe send a message saying "hey, just checking in to see if you're ok." The issue is if she says no, then she might expect you to listen to her vent or provide advice, in which case you'll be forced to either ghost her at that moment, state that you'll no longer be providing your services or end up doing the opposite, and that is what could be considered enabling. Even if she says shes fine, she might wonder why you haven't been messaging. You can either explain yourself or again, ghost her at that moment.
None of the above would be ideal I assume, since you'd rather have her reach out to you. Speaking of which, what will you do if she does?