Wow. I am so sorry. Personally, i think finding a t might be particularly difficult, because who doesnt drink nowadays? I found ACOA very helpful. Listening to other people talk about their really futile, hopeless relationships - i could really identify with them, and also see how hopeless my own situation was.

Remember Marlo Thomas' "Free to be you and me"? That also applies to other peoples right to be wrong - to their right to choose alcohol, and our right to choose not to be with them.

My mother was a gambler, and when i found out my t liked to gamble, i was like, great, now what. So i "analyzed" him, then i let it go, like a preference for Coke over Pepsi. It wasnt a major theme in my therapy. But i keep running into substance abusers.