No, it isn't. And the decision is completely your own, but if you start feeling sorry and guilty that he's there in the nursing home - which, let's face it, are never little pieces of heaven - and you decide to return to things as they were, you will be right back where you were, facing a breakdown of your own.

It's hard. We finally put my mother in a nursing home - albeit the best, closest, most expensive one we could find - and she did nothing but complain, and criticism, and b---ch. I felt guilty the entire time, but every time I considered the alternative, which was having her live with us, I knew I had to stick with my decision.

And part of this, a big part, was not just the level of care she would have needed, but the, shall we say, complete lack of sympathetic bonding between her, my husband, and myself. If she had been a different person I wouldn't have hesitated. And of course even then if a person reaches a need for a certain level of care that only a hospital can provide, then that decision would have to be reached as well. But we would have taken her in for as long as we could had there been love and understanding between the 3 of us.

Take care and please do keep in touch.

OOPS! I think I'm late with this. I believe I missed some posts. Will go back and review.