Quote:
Originally Posted by Omers
My T is VERY experienced with well over 30 years of being a T. He has a ton of specialized training and some awesome CEUs...
But more and more I am feeling like he has never worked with trauma with the breadth and depth of mine. Then I think I am just trying to be “special” by being the worst or some stupid ego trip. I don’t believe in comparing traumas, what is no big deal for me would break others instantly and the same the other way around. I know when I was a trainer in child welfare I used myself as an example a lot because it gave the case workers a perspective that didn’t challenge their knowledge/experience directly. Sometime I made it sound like it was several cases I had been privy to but other times I owned up that it was all me. Most were shocked no matter how experienced they were. So, is it possible T hasn’t run into this??? Or maybe he has run into all the little pieces but not this much in one person?
I know T does a lot of self care but I am starting to worry. I told him one story today and he was too shocked to even rub his head... I hate to tell him but there is another identical one in there only worse... or do I not tell him?
Feeling so confused, lost, broken.
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Hi Omers,
Thank you for sharing this.
Some really good insight in what you wrote. I think it makes sense that if your therapist has not run into a specific type of trauma, he may react the way he did. Perhaps it isn't so much that he hasn't heard similar things as much as he may be surprised to hear it from you. Is this something that you haven't touched on yet with your therapist?
Are you planning to talk to him about this? I recommend doing so.
I have found that being completely honest about these kinds of things in therapy (no matter how blunt it may seem) has usually brought out a positive exploration of the situation for both parties. On one hand, it would provide you an opportunity to express your concerns and hopefully in doing so he would be more inclined to share his. Perhaps he is uncomfortable talking about specific things? Or maybe he is not a good fit? Maybe he was shocked, maybe he wasn't prepared for it. It could be a bunch of different things...
I consider myself an empath and even though I have been through trauma in my life, I can freeze sometimes when someone shares their trauma story with me. I often feel like I should behave in a way that is more respectful to the survivor but I don't know what that is exactly; so I do nothing and just scratch my head. It recently happened to me when a fellow student admitted to me that he had been sexually abused as a child. The problem for me wasn't that he was divulging sensitive information to me (as it means he trusts me), the problem was that we didn't know each other well enough to go into that territory. (Boundaries) I even apologized the next time I seen him if I seemed insensitive. I just didn't know what to think and how to help him. I recommended that he go see a therapist at the University and he did.
Do you think this might be part of the problem?
Thanks,
HD7970ghz