I found this article interesting to read:

Attachment Theory and the Psychotherapy Relationship | Society for the Advancement of Psychotherapy

This part was disconcerting to me and made me feel anxious about sharing my attachment/transference with a therapist. If I did so and they responded my creating “distance” to provide a “corrective emotional experience”, I think that would make me feel a lot of shame, like there was something wrong with me for wanting closeness, or like he was punishing me for something. But I’m sure I’m reading this with my anxiety/insecure attachment hat on. Problem is, whichever way I look at it it’s painful:

“According to this model, clients with hyperactivating tendencies are helped by gradually increasing therapeutic distance -- to the extent that the client’s frustration will allow, in order to create a corrective emotional experience of growing autonomy. “

I’m definitely this:

“Mikulincer and Shaver (2007) describe how persons blocked in their efforts to seek comfort from a secure attachment engage in one of two “secondary strategies.” Persons who rely on a hyperactivating strategy magnify their expression of distress, closely monitor attachment figures for signs of abandonment, and attempt to establish very close proximity to a potential source of comfort. The “proximity” could be actual physical distance, but more often takes the form of close emotional dependency.”