You're a much more patient man than I am...In my book what she's doing constitutes not only abandonment but mental cruelty as well. It's time to think about the kids and how this is affecting them. We take vows to stay with someone thru sickness and in health but what I see is willful sickness and definitly a time when a separation is in the best interest of all parties. Her ability to inflict her drama upon you and the kids is wrong and needs to be stopped.