I think only you can say if it counts as a relapse for you. For me, any self-harming behavior that I engage in, counts as a relapse, but just because I take a strict view of myself (and I'm currently trying to disengage from the behavior and so I think I'm stricter on myself because of it) doesn't mean that that is true for you. I'm sorry that you are going through this and that you don't feel like you can talk to your friends about it. That's hard. That is how I was for years, and have only recently begun to open up to a few friends about it. I hope the group experience will be a good one for you and will lead to some good resources. Gentle Hugs, Kit