Today just sucks. My cat is dying and there is nothing I can do. I am not coping well at all. I don't have the money to put him to sleep or I would have already done so. Watching him slowly die is torture. I don't know if I can have another cat after this. This is too painful. I have lost 4 cats in 5 years. Why does this keep happening? He is only 6 for god sake. Unfortunately he has FIV. I knew this would eventually happen but it doesn't make it any easier. I have been up with him since 3 am. I am exhausted and stressed out. I am worried that this will lead to another panic attack. I hope not. This just really sucks. Why does it have to be Easter weekend? I am supposed to be happy and celebrating with my family but instead I am watching my cat die. There will be no celebrating for me this year.