The thing is - and I respect your opinion sarahsweets - I don't need to let someone off the hook to learn something. I don't know what you mean by acceptance. If someone I'm dating hits me (which has happened), why would I need to accept that behavior in order to move on? I don't accept physical abuse from a man. Him hitting me has taught me that some men will physically abuse me. Doesn't mean I have to accept it as the norm. Doesn't mean I have to forgive those men who've hit me, in order to move on. I'm trying to understand where you're coming from. Can you give me an example of what you mean for context sake?