When someone practices "witholding" when they don't get their way Gymgirl, it's toxic and a red flag that it's not a healthy person to continue to have a relationship with.

This can be something you experienced growing up as a child, often this is something children experience when a parent or both parents are alcoholics. There was nothing you could do other than learn how to thrive in that kind of dysfunction. It's important to understand that NOW as an adult you have a right to change having to exist in that kind of dysfunction. That is something that so many of the members here are trying to help you understand and why you really need to walk away from this guy completely.

I did not get that kind of advice when I was young like you. I did not have access to a site like this. I ended up suffering a lot because of it. You have a right to learn and you are still young enough to learn what red flags to look for, what you experienced was never your fault and that you deserve to experience a much healthier relationship. This guy has you convinced anything bad that happens is YOUR FAULT. You need to recognize how you began to believe him and WHY that is so unhealthy for you.

This last experience is PROOF that any attempt on your part to have a relationship with this individual will result in your being hurt and abused. Use this as a lesson and continue to get therapy so you can learn how to actually BELIEVE you deserve better so you don't fall into this kind of trap again.