I realized that I don't like when you focus on the healthy choices or progress I've made when it really really hurts anyway.
If I tell you I had a really really hard evening and everything really hurt but I did something else instead of hurting myself then you'll focus on that. You'll be happy about that. You won't be thinking about how much it still hurt the entire time.

If I agree to take it off the table then none of my pain will ever matter.
If a tree falls in the forest, but there's no one there to hear it...
If I'm in pain, but I don't engage in self destructive behaviors...