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Apr 21, 2019, 08:43 AM
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Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope
I understand! I understand tolerances and that we each have different thresholds. I also understand patterns and thinking that it can’t improve. But it can. People can break patterns.
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Yes, patterns can be broken. An example would be: I was abused as a child/teen by my father and grew up with an unhealthy relationship and view of men. Once I started dating in my teen years I picked guys that treated me like crap, objectified me and abused me because its what I was used to. I met my husband when I was 18 and got together with him that spring but when I met him I was in an abusive relationship and was not looking for a new relationship. When we got together I tried sabotaging the relationship and pushing him away to see if he would stay. A therapist told me that i would know when a relationship was good for me because it would feel so weird, unsettled and abnormal- because I was being treated well, not the usual abuse and chaos of my regular bad choices. I do believe the cycles can be broken and your "fate" can be altered.
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"I carried a watermelon?"
President of the no F's given society.
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