My Support Forums - View Single Post - Women's Self-Esteem and Self-Respect

sarahsweets · Apr 21, 2019 at 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I understand! I understand tolerances and that we each have different thresholds. I also understand patterns and thinking that it can’t improve. But it can. People can break patterns.

Yes, patterns can be broken. An example would be: I was abused as a child/teen by my father and grew up with an unhealthy relationship and view of men. Once I started dating in my teen years I picked guys that treated me like crap, objectified me and abused me because its what I was used to. I met my husband when I was 18 and got together with him that spring but when I met him I was in an abusive relationship and was not looking for a new relationship. When we got together I tried sabotaging the relationship and pushing him away to see if he would stay. A therapist told me that i would know when a relationship was good for me because it would feel so weird, unsettled and abnormal- because I was being treated well, not the usual abuse and chaos of my regular bad choices. I do believe the cycles can be broken and your "fate" can be altered.