I wrote something you'll be happy about. The kind of stuff you try to get me to write. It made me feel a little bit better I guess. But I wasn't having those thoughts when I wrote it, and later when I'm having those thoughts I'm certainly not going to read it.

Don't get too excited. I have really really conflicting feelings about when you seem happy and proud because of something like this.
I don't want you think I'm better and stop being so gentle with me.

Edit: I also did some stuff you won't be happy about. I have conflicting feelings about your reaction to that too.