Hi all,

Thank you to many of you for your advice on my thread regarding asking my college professor to be my therapist. I appreciated all your posts and thought about my decision for a few days. At the end of the day, I decided it would be very difficult to separate her Professor persona from her Therapist one, so I called a counseling center in a nearby town that I hadn't yet been to.

Yesterday I had my first session with a new therapist, after searching for someone I could connect with for several months. I've tried four others since last September but didn't make it beyond two sessions with any of them. It wasn't that they were bad in any way, they just didn't "feel" right.

I met her and was instantly put at ease by many (seemingly irrelevant) details. Her office was very cozy, and when we sat down I noticed she sat cross-legged in her chair. I don't know why, but this put me at ease. Like she was able to get comfortable so I could too.

I really liked how she was prepared with a series of questions to ask me about my history. Although this might seem typical, two of the therapists I met previously didn't gather this information and started the conversation with "so what brings you in today?" Which is fine for some, but I have a hard time verbalizing a lot of my issues and was glad to see that this T took the lead in the conversation at first. By doing this she eased me into discussion of deeper/more painful parts of my past.

Our conversation flowed effortlessly, and she had a great sense of humor. I did not feel awkward at all, as we chatted as much as we discussed my problems themselves. I struggle a lot with vulnerability and tend to ramble when put on the spot, but she had a way of making sure this didn't happen.

From my post history it's clear that a recent breakup has contributed a large amount of stress to my life. I wanted to begin talking about it yesterday, but I told her that I knew I wouldn't be able to do it without crying. So I gave her the gist of the situation and plan to discuss it at greater length next session. In addition, I also have OCD and general depression/anxiety issues. Insecure attachment in relationships is something I'd like to work on (also evident from my previous posts).

I'm SO beyond excited for the chance to work with this therapist. The only thing that made me a bit uncomfortable was when I realized just how young she is. She is around 30, and I am 24. I don't see it being an issue though, and I definitely plan to see her despite the close age. If she were in her mid-20s I don't know if I could say the same thing, honestly. I dealt with bullying (and resulting anxiety) in middle school and have a hard time opening up to people my age. Having a T that young would feel too much like talking to one of my peers. Probably petty, but I hope that makes sense.

I haven't been this glad to start therapy since I was a teenager. However, I can already feel myself becoming attached to her, almost like I'm displacing my prior attachment from my ex-boyfriend onto her. It isn't a sexual thing, it's for comfort. I'm not sure if that's a problem or not.

The reason I am making this post is because I'm considering following up with T by sending her an email since I won't be able to see her again until May 7th (she's booked solid all next week). I'd basically like to let her know that I'm really looking forward to working with her and thanking her for taking me on as a client, and letting her know that I tried to make an appointment for next week but wasn't able to. Would it be overkill or inappropriate to send her this email? I'm sure she's aware that I couldn't get in next week so I guess that wouldn't be necessary. I just want to let her know how excited I am to work with her.

......Aaaaaaaaand cue my attachment issues. I'm serious you guys, I can already feel it and it's bad. She's just so amazing so far that I'm gushing.

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