I hurt myself late Tuesday night. I drove to the local hospital and was then sent to the main hospital by ambulance. I received treatment and had to stay there until I was reviewed by psych. So after 24 hours waiting (giving me time to hurt myself again), I saw someone from the psych liaison team who said she'll discuss what's happened and how I'm feeling with my own psychiatrist. I never lie when I talk to the specialists as I think it's unfair to them as it just wastes their time. Anyway, 5 hours later the liaison psych person came back and said I was okay to be discharged home and that my psychiatrist will see me next week. During our chat earlier that day she asked if I'd be safe at home (as I'd be alone) and I told her I wouldn't buy that I don't want to be safe either. She asked if I would go into hospital if my psychiatrist suggested it and I told her I didn't want to be admitted and I'd still find a way to harm myself whilst there anyway. So after my second talk with psych I mentally couldn't cope with the thought of travelling home, so I went into the toilet on the ward and hurt myself again, determined to just bleed out there. But the nurse unlocked the toilet door from the outside and caught me. So I discharged myself from the ward as I told them there is no point caring for the wound and I'm now on my way home. I'm just too exhausted to carry on. Sorry for the saga, I just need to vent to people I don't know.