Gymgirl you'll continue to obsess about your ex and even text with him until you consciously accept that you accept bad boy behavior as your 'norm' b/c you have some psychological patterns you developed as a child that you use as an adult, that are dysfunctional coping skills.

Your therapist, along with you doing the psychological work, will help you reverse these dating patterns but it won't happen overnight. Could take months, even years. Any little activity you do for your ex, keeps you stuck. You have to stop contacting him. You have to stop thinking and obsessing about him. Letting him take up space in your mind keeps you trapped.