I'm feeling terrible again. I took some vacation from my job for a few days to go visit my family because things were getting unbearable, and it really helped. I was still down but feeling stronger and with some sight of the future. Now I've returned, and it just feels like I'm back to being locked in my head with no one to understand me. I feel like everyone thinks I'm crazy and that I'll fail in my jobs and end up all alone. I'm unable to work on projects because I just feel so sad. I have this boss who criticizes/ignores me, and every time I think about my future I worry that everyone will have the same opinion of me as her. My boyfriend is such a positive person, and he just says I'm pretty and changes the subject when I express my sadness and fear. Too boot, I used to be able to hide my blues pretty well, but these days I get tears in my eyes so easily and I have these deep bags under my eyes. I just want to cry and cry.