I used to struggle with that same thing with former T. Wanting to know how her vacation was, but also wanting to pretend it didn't affect me. I also had a hard time with the first session back. It seemed like it usually took a little while to get back into the groove of things. Like something was off kilter at first. I didn't like that at all. Maybe tell your T kind of what you said here. That you have trouble trying to figure out how to be at that first session back. I bet your T can help you through it. HUGS Kit