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Old May 01, 2019, 11:30 AM
s4ndm4n2006's Avatar
s4ndm4n2006 s4ndm4n2006 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: limbo
Posts: 2,052
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton View Post
Here is what I think... in my experience when guys stop talking they aren't happy and are trying to keep from saying something that you won't like. They will say they are in their own head but they are in their own head, talking to themselves about what an idiot you are.

I'm going to be the devil's advocate here in that there is a lot of comments here making pretty disparaging statements about the guy and no one has said anything about the fact that likely these are two individuals that frankly to not match up. Enough said, really.

To be honest about the quote above? The assumptions made are quite simplistic and stereotyping of males. I cannot dispute anyone's experience but to assume this is true across the board for men (or any other group) is just foolhardy and writes off a good portion of men that do not typically speak a lot and are not ones for conversation.

I for one am one that will tend to be quiet a lot of the time not having a lot to say especially in a new relationship with someone. To assume that I'm going to be looked at as if I am having second thoughts, am not interested or any number of other incorrect assumptions is just not at all accurate. Being in your head does not mean you're thinking about "what an idiot" the other person is, but to be honest, I can sit for great lengths of time being "in my head" thinking about a number of other things or having the weight of many things going on in there.

Just thought I'd add that for the record. It isn't always true and I'd warn against assuming it is.

Can we move away from framing this guy as some "papa smurf" or other insulting terms and just stick with the fact that he is not the type of person that she has a lot in common with?
Thanks for this!
Iloivar, unaluna