fern46 and Jedi67, thanks for posting about this. I can say that it is similar with what I've put my husband through. If I were to quit meds and go bat **** crazy and in and out of the hospital again, it would torture him and definitely set me waaaaaaaaaaay back again, not just psychologically, but financially...or dead. I guess I can say that I eventually did find my bottom, which is unfortunately what some people have to reach to quit demonizing medications. Now I am very grateful for my medications and have reached a peace with them. However, I have also found a cocktail that I can live with. I have also reached a point of clarity of thinking to look at them realistically, seeing their benefits as way beyond their detriments.

My family lost my youngest nephew to bipolar disorder two years ago next month. He had quit his medications. He had a "honeymoon" period, but the illness came back with a vengeance and it overtook him like a tidal wave. He was not sufficiently medicated when he lost his life (just home from a 3-day too short hospitalization), nor had he been able to have the patience needed to find stability again. He would have eventually, I know.

I know we get on crappy med cocktails that make life seemingly just as miserable or even more miserable than times not on medication. That isn't acceptable! However, I have learned that the solution is not to give up cold turkey. You do have to fight, but do so while keeping yourself as protected as possible, not exposing a vulnerable underbelly.

Accepting a serious mental illness and its treatment was also very difficult for me. I rebelled. I suffered. I rebelled again. It overtook me again and again. I then had to accept. Part of the acceptance involved a period of grieving. But we can all get past the grief and move on in a healthy way. I had to do the same with alcohol. Alcohol's appeal is sort of like the appeal of hypomania or mania, too often romanticized, but if it becomes abuse or dangerous, it must be stopped.